I return to work from my maternity leave on Monday. Yesterday, I was prepared, organized and even a little excited. Today, I am anxious, overwhelmed and a little pissed. I'm pissed because I HAVE to go back to work even though I want to work. I am pissed that people ask me if I have to go back to work, as though its a bad thing. I'm pissed that I've been sick all week and I'm pissed that my work pants do not yet fit me.
For me, as a working mom, it's not the "work" that is the hardest. It's not even the "leaving my baby part" that is the hardest. It's the balancing act that comes with working all day yet still being expected to have toilet paper in every bathroom, a decent meal prepared each night, tummy time, books read, people fed, floors cleaned, clothes washed, time for girlfriends, date nights, bills paid, a good run, etc.
Lets face it, "me" time at this point involves and magazine and a toilet. But, it's what I signed up for and perfection is impossible, so I can only do my best......But for today, I'm pissed about it.
Sometimes, life is like a box chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get. And sometimes, it isn't and you know it is going be hard as shit but then....it will be ok. (Hallmark are you listening??)