The beginning of the end of the new beginning.

Well, Monday marks a day that we haven’t been waiting for but knew was coming. The first day, of the criminal trial for the person who hit E from behind, which lead to his traumatic brain injury. The criminal trial was not pursued by us. It is pursued by the District Attorney due to the extent of injury caused to E.
E and I have both been summoned to testify at some point during the trial. Neither of us have an interest in going other than to fulfill our obligation to the court.

I posted a little something to the “bad guy” who did this to E about 1 year ago and I feel exactly the same now (with a small update) as I did then so I will say it again.

Dear Bad Guy,
I just want you to know that my husband is a good guy and so am I and our 5 year old who were peacefully sleeping in bed, when you changed our lives forever.

We forgive you. (You can thank our son Hudson for that, as forgiveness is a hard but important lesson to teach.) Justice to me, would not be sending you to jail. What I would do is fly to Montana where you have been living your "normal" life and I would serve you with a 1 year sentence. You would need to work 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for 360 days at a brain injury rehabilitation center. No pay. You would have to figure out another way to get by that year as we did. Its part of the journey. And you better give it your all every single day or the days will start over. And at the end of the year, you would bring me flowers (hey, its my vision) and have dinner with E and I. You would apologize and we would accept.

Forget arguing in court over what happened, why it happened, how it happened. It happened and we all get what we give in this life.
So you, bad guy, give someone else, who is deserving, a year (plus) of your life that you stole from ours and we will call it good. If you have any kind of a soul at all, which I believe you probably do, it will change your life just like it has changed ours.

Hey bad guy, you're welcome. At the end of the day, a lot of great things have come out of this (no thanks to you) and E and I are both different people from this experience. I don't regret what we have gone through to get here, I do regret the way that it happened. Nonetheless, we forgive you.


UPDATE: I am now pregnant and less tolerable of “bullshit.” As a result, if before dinner, I could have just 5 minutes, alone with you in a room so I can give you the verbal ass-hole ripping, tongue lashing, and maybe some finger pointing, that quite frankly, you have coming to you from the wife of the guy whom you attacked, that would be great. I think a big guy like you would be impressed by the number of F-bombs a small person like me can fit into a 5 minute verbal assault. Just ask my husband.




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The days AFTER Labor day.

Yesterday was one of my favorite days of the year. The day AFTER Labor Day. All kids and teachers are back in school (you know, because I get jealous when they are at the beach and I am working), the Horse Track ends, which means traffic improves around our house, and tourists go home, which means we get our sleepy little beach town back.

In addition, it means "fall" weather is near, football season aka. Crock-potting season, leather boots, dark nail polish, pumpkin spice lattes and cool nights. All of my favorite things, not to mention the holidays are near, and oh yeah, we're having a baby.

That being said, it's busy as hell around here! We are ALL getting acclimated to kindergarten and all that in entails. We are busy making new friends, figuring out exactly (to the minute) what time to leave in the morning to get to kinder just before the bell, packing lunches, learning Spanish, going to bed early, growing a baby in the belly (just started 3rd trimester), dealing with brain injury “stuff” and sweating, because its still bloody hot around here.

But, unfortunately, there is always time for crazy pregnant behavior......

Random guy in the grocery store parking lot: “You must be pregnant?”

Me: “Yes”

Him: “I figured because you're too young and too skinny to be that fat.”

Me: “Oh, well, thank you? And while we’re jumping to conclusions, may I guess that you sir, must be having a mid-life crisis? You’re too bald and too old to be driving that sports car.”

Dear Random dudes,
Unless you have a testicle that is swollen to the size of a watermelon, you don’t get to judge, comment or even try to compliment a pregnant lady. It usually just backfires and then it is awkward for both of us.

Thanks,
Grumpy pregnant chick.




A "Star chart" that Hudson made for me. Stars if I'm good, an "X" if I'm bad. I've been good so far, at least in his eyes.

The next step

Well... we made it through the first day of kindergarten. It feels like a dream as it came and went in such a blur. Before you know it, he will be driving, going to prom and getting drunk on Boones Farm (I hope not.)

I never understood what the big fricken deal was about starting kindergarten until.....I happened to my kid. None of us had tears, we were all mentally ready but I still felt the magnitude and the velocity of what what happening from about 6am-8:15am this morning.

So, the other kicker about today was that Hudson got in to the Dual Language Immersion Program. A BIG deal for E and I as we really wanted this for him. (lottery winners!)
100% Espanol from day one people. The kindergarten DLI teachers are not allowed to speak any English to the students or the parents (at least in front of the students.)

Right out of the gate, Hudson's teacher asks him (and all of her students as they walk up):

"Como te llama?" (What is your name?)

I watched him struggle and then I translated for him in his ear. Shortly after, she managed to form them all in a line and had them quieted and following her into the classroom like little ducklings....all done in Spanish.

((The DLI curriculum slowly integrates English back in, so that by 6th grade (the final year of the DLI program) they are reading, writing, and speaking in English and Spanish. That's sort of the deal, in a small nut shell.))

When he came home today, I asked him how it went and he said "It went great mom."

Then later he said, "Mom, do you know what 'Grande' means?" I didn't want to burst his bubble with my Spanish skills, "Un mas grande cervesa por favor?" (One more large beer please.)

So I said "No?"

"It means 'Large' mom."

A great day indeed.

On another note.......
One major difference between 1st and 2nd pregnancy.
1st pregnancy: "How am I ever going to push a baby out of this?"
2nd pregnancy: "Holy shit, I just sneezed, is the baby on the floor?" How am I going to keep this kid in there for another 3 months? I'm seriously afraid to laugh too hard or I may crown.

Pregnancy Rant: Bumbo seat recall

I attended my girlfriends baby shower just this past Sunday, and bought her something that I loved and used when Hudson was a babe. A Bumbo seat. You know those colorful chairs made of foam that you can set babies in. Well, they were recalled today due to a large amount of infant skull fractures while using the Bumbo seat.

So, I let my girlfriend know that I had just bought her a baby skull crushing item, but I kept mine and was still intending to use it, you know, the way it was intended. She agreed and mentioned she wasn't an idiot.

First of all, these are chairs for babies, not full time nannies. It says right on the box that they are not to be used on high surfaces and you are not to leave your baby unattended.....so basically don't set your baby on top of the bar, in the seat, while you go do Jagger bombs, you dip shits. The Bumbo seats are merely a way to hold your baby up while your are on the floor playing with them or trying to shove peas into their mouth, not as an excuse to prop them up on the dinner table so you can see them while you mow the lawn.

What is wrong with people? No wonder these chairs made of nothing but foam, cost an arm and a leg, complete boneheads purchase them, misuse them and then sue the company. You don't need straps in the god damned chair to protect your baby, just pay attention to your kid and use your head.

I'm going to write a parenting manual called "Common Sense" and it's going to be 1 page long with one sentence "Use common sense and your kids will be fine."

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/08/15/bumbo-baby-seats-recall-_n_1778152.html

A birthday letter: Five

Dear Hudson,
Happy 5th birthday! This year was big, as your dad continues to recover, you adjust so well. You have a huge heart, you're a rule follower, and you still punch your dad in the "peanuts" which isn't that cool. You are neurotic about your hair, obsessed with collecting keys and still aspire to be a real ninja.

Your preschool teachers described you as loyal, a good friend and creative. Not to shabby.

This year you learned how to snap your fingers (getting blisters from practicing), you learned how to ride a 2 wheel bike, you love art, and you started Karate to work toward your ninja dreams.

You watched me pee on a stick and after explaining what to look for, your response was "Oh my gosh mom, WE are having a baby!" It was the response that every woman wants from their husband. Because at 4, you are not doing the math, running the numbers or re-working the house plans for a new baby. You are just genuinely excited. I wish this as something you could hold on to when you go through this with your own family one day, if that's what you choose.

You tell me repeatedly that you are going to marry the baby, your sister, and have more babies that I can take care of. I don't have the heart to tell you that's highly inappropriate (in this state at least.) Of course I asked you the question most (warped) mothers would "What if she's ugly?" you responded with "Well then I will make her pretty, I will get her earrings, some bracelets and maybe a necklace or something." Brilliant.

To top off the year, you graduated preschool and in one week you will be starting kindergarten. Immersion kindergarten. Which means you will be taking on a whole new school, all new friends and a new language. You are excited and open minded. I know that this experience will shape your life and I can't wait to see what you do with it.

Again, all that being said, you have taught ME so much this year. Patience, unconditional love, and how not to hold a grudge for more than 60 seconds, being the top 3. Although we've had a trying last year and a half, you still have so much love for your dad and I. You look past all the stress and the bullshit and always remember what's most important. Your simple mind in a complicated world keeps me a (fairly) sane and extraordinarily happy person.

Thank YOU, Hudson, for the best year yet. I can't wait to see what this year will bring.

Love, your momma.

P.s. You have convinced me to go to Disneyland twice in one year. I hate Disneyland but I love you, so, your welcome and don't expect to go again this year.

The name game.

When you get pregnant, there are 3 things that everyone wants to know.

1. When are you due?
2. Are you going to find out the sex or wait for the surprise?
3. Do you have any names picked out?

The due date is easy. The second response was always "The surprise is if this baby is going to be a Harvard graduate or a serial killer. I need to know if
I’m going to be working with a penis or a vagina for the next 20+
years.”

As for my third response, now that we are 100% sure (unless the ultrasound was wrong) we are having a girl, the big question is “Do you have any names picked out and what are they?”

This topic is a little dicey for me and here is why. For some reason,
people ask you, you tell them, and then they feel the need to give you
their opinion. Which I think is weird. But, we all do it, myself included.

This is why, I am generally not a name sharer before the baby is born because once your baby is born and you decide to name them after your favorite Power Ranger - people are not going to give you their opinion on what a dumb name it is to your face. They will do it behind your back and in this one particular instance, that’s how I prefer.

So, do we have a name picked out? Yes, we have a few, but we probably
wont decide until we see her (or him…you never know.) Am I going to
share what the names are? No. But if you REALLY want to know, you can
ask E or Hudson and I am sure they would be more than happy to tell
you the name of the day.

In Montana.....

Finished pre-school. Last summer hurrah. In Montana. Be back soon!