Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Wherever you go, there you are.

Perhaps it's coming from a small town where everybody knows your business. (Ok, everybody is knee deep in your business.) I've learned through time and in living in the same city for 10 years now, that even a big city, becomes a small town. (If you live there long enough actually do shit.) That being said, for the longest time, I forgot about caring about being liked.

Now, as my kid is full swing in school (1st grade), and I've been in the same "town" for quite sometime, I find myself feeling insecure again.

E does 99.9% of Hudsons drop offs at school. As a result, when I do show up, I feel like an alien. The moms are chit chatting their school mom shit and I'm like "Hey, wow, it's hot today huh?" And then to make matters worse, the "room mom" who is at the epicenter of the moms, definitely does not like me or my kid. (Fact, just take my word for it.)

It's funny because aside from the few words we exchanged last year, she doesn't know me at ALL and I want to say "Hey, I have a story you know, I'd be here too (not 500 hrs a year because that just overboard and you need a life) but nonetheless, I HAVE to work."

But then why do I care?

I care because, I'm human.

So then, I go to pick up Hudson from the YMCA skate park after school and the instructor takes me aside to talk about, in his words, an "incident" that happened.

Basically, a kid bought Hudson some Skittles the other day and to "repay" him Hudson gave him some brand new Skate Deck (mini skateboard figures) and when the mom got word of this she was "confused" and "uncomfortable."

Basically I was told, no more gifts to kids. I walked away feeling 1. Like a complete pedophile and 2. Worried what the skate instructors and mom thought about me.

I could tell, Hudson was bummed on the whole situation and told me that we had to "tell dad the bad news." Yep, that's right Arterburns, no more gifts you CREEPS.
I'm not gonna lie, today spun me out a little. There were a million other story lines that ran through my head on what other people were thinking but I won't bore you with those. Lets just say, we are all hard on ourselves, and when you have kids, just multiply it by infinity.

So maybe I'm being sensitive to the fact that, I feel like I'm never 100% vested in anything I'm doing during the day and because being a working mom is fucking hard and we should really be nicer to each other.

Especially that bitch who clearly doesn't like me.....whoever she is.


  1. Love this, Mandy! Who could possibly NOT like you? She's just jealous! And, way to teach a first grader to be generous! I do know that even in PR, the techers were ultra sensitive about kids giving other kids gifts. Mostly because hyper sensitive parents would go ape-shit about stuff like that and the teacher didn't want to have to deal with them.

    This is the most precious picture of the kids.....

  2. Thank you! What is it about schools that bring out the insecurities? I totally had a WTF day last week. When I picked Kieran up from school, I was in workout clothes, with Simon strapped onto my front. There were four other moms, all with perfect clothes and blowouts, and they looked at me like I was crazy. Maybe I was a bit disheveled (my hair is still crazy), but come on, we all have toddlers! Brought me right back to walking through the gym on the first day of school. Your son is obviously generous and gracious, so the other parents can suck it.

  3. Granted, I don't know much about mom stuff yet but I do know about judge-y bitch grown woman stuff and I agree with laurel- they can suck it when it's directed at you and they can SUPER suck it when it is pointed towards your kid. I'll be your backup posse anytime. Ditto to you, laurel

  4. Mandy, I will be honest and admit I haven't been on your blog in a while (truth be told, I haven't updated my own blog in like 7 months). But I did tonight and WOW! Thank you! I needed that. I had one of those not so great days today and part of it had to do with school. It is not easy working full-time and raising two kids (actually twins). I am glad I not alone. Thank you.

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