It's beginning to look a lot like..

Tonight was Hudson's night to choose the dinner menu.
So....cheese quesadillas and chocolate chip cookies it is. I did make some Carne Asada on the side for E, although I do think it should be a rule that you have to stick to the menu plan.

E is a full on "driver" and it's fantastic. It's like having a newly licensed 16 year old in the house.

Me: Oh shit, I'm about to make Carne Asada and I forgot the Carne (meat)
E: I'll go get it!
Me: Awesome. I need a bottle of Cabernet to cook with as well. Could you throw in a few?

So after going through (in this order) Anxiety, fear and heart palpitations....I now feel sweet relief. E being able to drive is physical proof he's getting better. (Although I have yet to get in the car with him)

Hudson and I did a Target run tonight for the usual....Toilet paper, glow sticks, holiday pjs and hot sauce. Hey, it's Super Target.

I believe I've created a holiday "monster" like myself and I had to make the adult decision to NOT buy Christmas pajamas. However, because he's been wearing the shit out of his costume, I figured a little Halloween pj action would be appropriate.

Although things seem to be stabilizing a bit from within, there is a lot of "stuff" happening outside (ie. Whats happening to the dude that has a big fist and tiny balls who caused E's traumatic brain injury) and I will be discussing at my own pace. Because this is my blog and I do what I want.



Like i said....Glow sticks and Halloween pajamas.




Beetlejuice?




A raccoon named Henri in my kitchen.




Family Scrabble. Sounds so cheesy but it's great for brain injuries and wives of brain injured guys who cook with Cabernet. Hudson is the official "letter getter" and I don't know about you, but I read "asshole way." Just a thought.

Words of wisdom.

It is always nice to end the weekend with a few words of wisdom and simplicity.






If your not inspired or smiling, something is wrong.

6 months and Life to Go.

Today marks 6 months since E's TBI (traumatic brain injury.) What a week. What a half a year.

E is driving again. He will be starting work (very) part time and going to brain camp the other part of his time. Lots of appointments, work, brain camp and school.
Lots of change.

What have I learned in the last 6 months? Plan on change. And I was reminded of that unmistakably today.

I figured today would be a good day to play tourists and take in some local San Diego culture. This idea was spawn early this morning when I woke up at 6:30 am in order to get ready, get myself a pumpkin spice latte and make it to downtown San Diego by 8 am to attend a convention for work. Only to arrive and realize I was early. 2 weeks early. Yes, it's a proven fact, brain injuries are contagious. So, I came home, round up the boys (someone stayed out a bit too late last night) and drove downtown, again.

I had two specific intentions. 1. Go to the children's museum 2. Go to our favorite Australian restaurant, Bondi (for a beer, burger and sweet potato fries.)

Well.....the museum is closed for the month of September getting ready for a new exhibition and Bondi has been replaced by Donovan's Steak house. What a difference 6 months makes.

So.... we ate at Maryjanes Diner at the Hard Rock hotel for the beer, burger and fries (no sweet potato. Boo.) We went to the Balboa Park Train Museum for our culture and Hudson's "adventure" for the day. Not too shabby!

After going through the last 6 months, it takes a lot more than a few alterations in "the plan" to rock my boat. Although, I try to anticipate everything, I know that "the plan" is much bigger than my daybook can handle.

So, like the last 6 months, I will take the next 6 months, one day at a time.
And I will continue to PLAN on CHANGE.




E's last "full time" day at brain camp. Cooking with "Sam the Cooking Guy." A local celeb chef.




Buffalo chicken pizza. Yum!
P.s. I had Sam sign my Sam the Cooking Guy cookbook "I love you Mandy"
I have no shame.




E, super stoked that I'm taking his picture right now.




Me and Hud, super.




6 months and life to go.

On the road again......

Well let let's see, what happened today....
We woke up, had breakfast, Roomba cleaned our floors, and E got the ok to drive again!

We had our bigtime brain camp meeting today. E had two specific goals and was able to accomplish both within the last two months. 1. Drive 2. Work.

He will now be going to brain camp two days a week and will be working three. The great part about having both is, as issues come up at work (and they assured us they will) E can work it out at brain camp instead of having to deal with it on his own. Thank you brain camp!

Have I mentioned the nicknames E and his snarky friends have given me?
Mandatory, deMandying, ComMandying, Mandypants. You get the idea.
Needless to say, taking control of a situation comes naturally. However, I couldn't me more excited to give up the title of "family chauffeur." My life in the past six months has been like being a single mom of a special needs child with a dead beat dad.

Tomorrow, we celebrate E's last "full time" day at brain camp with Sam the Cooking Guy (a local celeb chef.) I've invited myself to the festivities and couldn't be more excited.







In the words of his (multiple) good friends, Oh boy......







He may have a brain injury but he's definitely not stupid.







Little tiger after school.







Celebratory meal. Yes, on a paper plate. Our dishwasher is broken.







Sweet potato mashed potatoes. Little. Orange. Different.







Hmm. Not sure who this is...







Oh, it's Henri. The begging dog.

Our new addition.

First of all....Happy Birthday Grandma Stroh!
I will forever remember going to the farm house in MN and stealing your endless supply of Spearmint Trident gum, Your crazy pinches in church when Mike and I were misbehaving, and watching Grandpa Stroh laugh so hard he cried while watching Tom and Jerry (the animated cartoon.)

Hudson LOVES Tom and Jerry and I think it's Grandpa Stroh saying hello every time Hudson giggles at Jerry hitting Tom over the head with a pan.....again.

So, our new addition.....
His name is Roomba. He cleans, doesn't talk back, and I don't have to potty train him. That's right, it's the round vacuum that cleans your floors while you're at work. It's a beautiful thing. He wasn't cheap but he IS cheaper than a housekeeper and/or a sibling for Hudson and for now, he does the work of both. Justified.

Oh and just when I think I don't need Costco in my life anymore, I go there and it totally redeems itself with Roombas, incessant supplies of fairly healthy kids snacks and Costco sized tubs of Tapioca pudding.

My so called Life

My life these days consists of a shit show of appointments, work, running a household and more appointments.

Granted, E is becoming more of helper as more time goes on, we are a long way from "back." I say this because brain injuries can be deceiving, even to me, someone who lives with one, who lives with one. However, when things around here naturally get moving at lightning speed, I am continually struck by it, and and it says "Hey lady, slow down, slow your ass down."

Tonight we had "family photos." (That sounds so lame every time I say it.) Anyway, we hiked it back into a really cool woodsy area deep in the heart of our "little" beach town. We had a few things in a bag- you know... treats, juice boxes, my cell phone. Someone (E) "forgot" to put it back into the car so I drove back to retrieve it, peeved, only to come home to find the dog had gotten out and was causing a ruckus in the neighborhood and my kid chowing down on "Lucky Charms" (the marshmallows only) for dinner. My husband somehow unknowing of all of this. So there is your example in case you wanted one.

At any rate things are moving along. Sometimes backwards, sometimes sideways, and most of the time, forwards.

Oh, did I mention my perfect son was dishing out major attitude this weekend, using my own one-liners, on me.
Things like:
"stop, you're being rude"
"give me some space"
"I'm over it"
"what the hell is wrong with you"

Tonight, I pray for patience. And a secret wine fairy.

Things we did this weekend. (In order)




Went to an adorable beach and backyard wedding. Although it's normal around here, it's still pretty awkward wearing a dress to the beach....and mine happened to be black....and the the exact same as another wedding guest. Awesome.



Hudson pre-wedding. Sand crab digging...in jeans.




Guess what came in the mail....and we wore to the grocery store...and the pharmacy, and.....



Set my table for "Fall." Peace put summer. Hello new Missoni (for Target) bowls and votives.



Went the park, in our pajamas....again. Sort of a Sunday morning tradition at this point.



Hudson, gearing up for pictures.....in the dirt.




The boys.




Me. Smiling. Not knowing what's about to hit me.

Don't stop believing (in the voice of Journey)

Wow. What a week. I'm the type of person who gets more done when there is a lot to do. When there is little to do, I...do...nothing. This week, there was much to do. However, Dave and Dodie were in town until this morning and helped A TON. I mean, Dodie cooks, Dave cleans, and the boys get suckers when they are picked up from brain camp/school (and I'm not the one picking them up.) Whats not to like?

Where do I begin. MANY changes coming our way. This is all a bit pre-mature to announce but I've never been very good at keeping my mouth shut when I should so here we go.

E and I have an "All staff" brain camp meeting next Thursday to go over the brain camp action plan. I will tell you, its announcing the date of Eric's discharge. I don't know when, but it will soon be on the calendar. They will give him a "part time work" permit. In addition, they are going to let the man drive. Yes, that's right. E will be on a road near you, very soon. When stating my concern about this to one of the doctors that I work with, he said, well, he can't be any worse than my 16 year old son, who is now on the road. Wow. Good point. Eric is extra cautious these days and has the life experience that 16 year olds definitely do not have.

All of this good news opened up a whole new ball of mommy wax (whack) for me. My husband is slowly but surely getting his wings back. The time is coming where I will no longer be able to talk about him behind his back to his 1,000 closest friends. I need to let go of the fact that he won't need me as much. A complete blessing? Absolutely. An adjustment? Yes. But a good adjustment.

I am so stoked to be getting my "husband" back but it's going to take practice to allowing him to spread his wings again without worrying my ass off that it will all go awry. I guess it's like watching your 16 year old drive off in their car for the first time or like sending your first born off to college. You are both ready for it but nervous nonetheless.

Finally, I must confess, I opened a bottle of wine tonight as well. I can only speak for myself but wine makes me a better person. Period.